I looked at my sleeping girls last night and wondered how I possibly had any peace.
But, I did. I had amazing amounts of peace. I was worn out, my feet hurt, my head hurt, and my eyes could hardly stay open. But there was peace.
Last Sunday my small Bible Study class took home the assignment of practicing thankfulness in order to unlock God's peace.
Monday being thankful was easy. It was a normal day. The girls were happy and active. Life was low-key and restful. I awoke Tuesday ready to get in a long run. However, one look at Micaela and the plans for the day shattered. She was seizing. A storm blew in the night before causing a power outage and at 5:54am that morning the power kick-started the air-conditioner. The noise startled Micaela into a seizure that she remained in and out of for the next two hours.
But, I had so much to be thankful for. I was thankful for the volunteer EMTs who got us to the hospital and the nursing staff and doctors who took care of us. I was thankful that Shaylee, my friend and respite care provider, was there to watch over Adela and later pick us up from the hospital. I was thankful for the recently downloaded Bible app on my phone that gave me God's word and my devotionals to keep me company as Micaela rested. I was thankful for the large cups of coffee and hazelnut creamer handed to me by a kind nurse. I was thankful for a Sonic cheeseburger when we were discharged and for the 4 1/2 hour nap Micaela took that afternoon while Adela and I made cookies. I was thankful for Micaela's smile when she woke up and hearing her say, "Mama." when I came in her room. There were countless ways God was gentle and loving towards me and mine.
Of course, there is another way I can tell the story. A story full of fear and anxiety and the injustice of my family having to suffer this way. But, as I would tell that story, I would have no peace. And God's provision is stronger than all and everything we will ever have to endure.
Can you believe that?
Can you, in your belief, trust God?