I pride myself on really knowing my family. I also pride myself on feeling connected to God often as I go through life, but our recent family vacation proved me wrong in the most beautiful way.
Today we're back home with a happy glow to our browner-than-before skin. A couple weeks ago, Jovani and I were gifted five days away at a cabin at Munds Park, AZ. We spent a lot of time outside and laughing. After years of parenting our girls, this is the first time that Micaela's health and the responsibilities of farming and ranching have allowed us to pack up and leave for a family vacation.
I had no idea how powerful this experience would be.
That first morning, we loaded the girls into the truck with the camper in the back full of fishing poles and sandwiches. The mountain air was crisp and clean, giving me that same feeling of climbing between fresh sheets on the bed--restful and waiting. My heart flopped and I made myself open my heart and mind to the possibilities of the morning. I had no idea how the girls would react to a lake fishing adventure but I knew that they were happy and excited and that my husband, Jovani was relaxed and thankful for a break and time with his girls. So, I let the worries about how Micaela would act and agreed that beyond sunscreen and bug spray, I needed to let my heart fill with peace and my mind stop planning out every minute.
As we reached the lake, we began to unload chairs and poles. I held Micaela's hand. The struggling began. She didn't know what she wanted or how to react to everything. She is a fighter and the moment she feels pushed or unsafe, she reacts with resistance and determination to remain as independent as possible. By the time we reached the shore, I was sweaty and frustrated and looking at my watch, calculating how long I really needed to put time in before retreating to the cabin and the sanity of toys and quiet.
Jovani began to prepare poles and Adela cast her first line out into the water. Baby mud hens chirped nearby, their parents hunting and feeding with industrious fury. Micaela, determined to join them, immediately waded into the lake. Distracted by the mud hens, I didn't catch her until her shoes and braces were soaked beyond redemption.
Great. Five minutes and my worst nightmares had been realized.
I began to pray. Just pray for a way to make it through some hours so that Adela and Jovani would be able to enjoy the lake. Then, as if receiving a message from above, I gasped and asked Jovani, "Do we have an extra pole?" A red pole was found and Micaela gleefully took hold of it and began to fish. She was avid, completely fixated on the activity. For the next four hours she hit the water determinedly with the pole and told us she was "fishing".
At one point, I just settled back into my chair and took it all in: Micaela's happy play that was so determined to match her papa's activities, Adela careful attention to her own activities and wonder at nature, Jovani's patience and peaceful attitude as he helped Adela and taught her how to bait hooks and take fish off the line. It was as if I was meeting them for the first time. Something about seeing them away from our normal lives showcased features of my loved ones I rarely see. It was beautiful, a landscape of God's workmanship and His hands in my family's life set to the background of God's mountains and water.
I saw them all out there. All of them.
I think we can get so used to the wonder of God in our normal lives, that we lose that feeling of awe. We lose that attitude of gratefulness. We lose that mentality of serving an awesome powerful God. But, on those days at the lake, I saw it all with sweet clarity as if He was showing it all to me for the first time.
Returning home, I felt new respect for my husband and felt the laughter come easier with him. I also felt as if my girls had grown up more. Not because they had done maturing in the mountain air, but because I saw them in different situations and settings and noticed things about them that I hadn't seen yet.
I found my life and faith and family again out on that lake.
Where and when have you felt your faith and your love for your family refreshed?
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"...and God was already there with me."