Academic Expectations and Christian Parenting

I was “that” kid. I loved school. I loved having the right answer and waving my hand for the teacher. I loved my perfect handwriting and A+ finished assignments. Later in life, the decision to earn my teaching degree was an easy one.

A decade later I became a mom. I stared down into the sleepy eyes of my newborn daughter and imagined how bright and brilliant she would be. God had some lessons to teach me about that.

For the past two years, Adela has not been even slightly interested in academics. She stomps around outside instead of drawing on paper. She colors to get it done instead of make it pretty. She wants nothing to do with flash cards and letter-tracing and counting.

Frustrated, I told my best friend with three young boys how worried I was. Surely there must be something wrong with my parenting techniques. My friend’s five-year-old could already identify letter sounds while my little Adela wouldn’t even write her name.

Expecting my friend to share secret learning activities with me, I was surprised when she laughed and said, “Lora, relax. There is a lot more to life than school.”

My friend said she felt lucky that her three boys were interested and quick to earn academic subjects, but that wasn’t going to help them become happy and healthy adults. Our society places so much weight on academic success, but the reality is that we need to know how to have friends and a relationship with God to find true joy.

“Look at Adela,” she said. “She is sweet, sensitive to the needs of others, and she is happy. She plays well with others and works hard to do her chores at home. Who knows what plans God has for her? I don’t think we get to pick that as parents. We are just here to the best job we can in helping them fill God’s purpose for their lives. That might involve a doctorate from a prestigious college or it might mean a GED and an ability to be loving wife and mother. Are you ashamed of just being a stay-at-home mom?”

My eyes widened. “No. I love it. I don’t even miss teaching.”

She smiled. “See?”

I did see.

From then on, with a lot of prayer, I’ve learned to release my child’s life into God’s plan and purpose. I help Adela work on those academic things, but I appreciate my daughter’s unique gifts. She is brilliant. She is bright. She sees the world with eyes that are not mine and loves with a heart that I could never have.

God made my little Adela. I will honor His creation and pray that as I mother her I prepare her for His loving plans.
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And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19, ESV 

Hope this article encourages you today! Have a wonderful school year!