A lot of ladies that come to me for coaching have some habit that they would like to stop, but it is also their way of coping--even if it is toxic. The problem usually is, that they just don't know what to do if they made it through a hard day or have something to celebrate without turning to tub of icecream or the TV remote. And, those rewards end up being less than rewarding. When the last bite is eaten or the screen is turned off, they feel like something is still missing.
A personalized reward list is one of the more fun coaching tips that I like to give out. First, I’m going to give you some basic reasons why it is important to have one, then I’ll lead you through some simple steps to creating one of your very own.
A personal reward list is full of things that give you pleasure and leave you feeling fulfilled. I think everyone should have one. It gives you resources to turn to when you need some self care or have something to celebrate, without falling back into coping mechanisms that don’t support whatever goals are important to you.
For example, if you have health goals then your rewards list would only include items that keep you on track with your diet expectations and allow you to get in bed at an hour that is right for you.
Another example is, if you have the goal of being debt free, then your rewards are going to be things that you thoroughly enjoy, but that don’t involve making spontaneous purchases each time you have a rough day.
Okay, Lora, you might say. Sounds great, but those self-care lists never really work for me.
Yeah, me, too. I spent years looking at Pinterest infographics on self-care with my nose wrinkled wondering how a face mask was going to fix things. But, then I discovered some really important things about personal rewards. So, let me share some things that will creating a personal rewards list that makes you smile:
I’m a type 1 on the enneagram and my love languages are acts of service and physical affection.
Okay, let me share ten of my favorites on my own rewards list:
Our world and culture loves to throw at us self-care that isn’t self-caring at all. From eating junk to spending our money recklessly to binging on mindless drama, we have to fight back by finding better ways to reclaim our health and freedom.
So, each of you has some really fun homework this week. I want you to create a personal rewards list, and if you have one, I want you to give it a loving make-over. Don’t forget to consider looking into personality quizzes and self-care research as you do this. And, I would love it if any of you got on Facebook or Instagram and let me know what your top rewards are.
by Lora Armendariz
You Can Do It!
Do you want to fall out of love with a destructive habit? The first 42 episodes of this podcast are a resource for anyone who wants encouragement and information as they take a six week break from a habit in order to fall out of love with it.