Regrets, Seedlings, and Reading Programs
Last September I shook my head at a row of lettuce. The mottly plants were sparse and their green leaves held a bitter flavor. I sowed them too soon. Afterwards, I had been unable to keep them weeded. Between the late summer heat and vivacious wild morning glories, I had another epic gardning fail on my hands.
Thankfully, it was only some lost elbow grease. I was able to re-start my growing by germinating my plants indoors. After several changes to seedling soil and conditions, I ended up with a fabulous stand of growing lettuce green in our greenhouse.
Timing is everything.
With that thought, I despaired reading the book "How to Teach Your Baby to Read". The book was given to me by a teacher. Written a couple decades ago, a group of professionals decided to help brain-damaged children overcome their developmental delays. It was during their research that they discovered an amazing truth: As long as a child can visually process and auditorilly process they can learn to read before they ever speak or write.
In fact, because of the way a baby's mind is growing, it is an ideal time to teach them written language. Micaela can learn how to read now. We don't need to wait for her speech to mature or her finger to become dexterious enough to manipulate pen and paper.
While this information excited me, it also made me sad. I should have started years ago with the reading program. It would be harder for her to learn now that she was no longer in her baby years.
Do you ever become paralyzed by regret? Does it ever make you want to throw in the towel and walk away? I do. My worst regrets have been in parenting. When someone points out one of Adela's bad habits I kick myself, saying I should have got ahead of it before it was an issue. Or when someone points out an intervention that will help Micaela progress, I worry that we didn't start doing it sooner.
What helps me so much is the fact that God is and has always been in control of each miniscule factor of my life. He is guiding me and providing for me as I go in this journey. I didn't get that book until October of this year. I have to trust that God gave it to me at just the right time for my little girl. So far, she loves every minute we spend reading her new words together. I truly feel we are making progress.
I consider my failed lettuce plants and smile. I learned so much through that process and I moved forward from it stronger and smarter.
I think that we often spend much time talking about trusting God with our future, but it is equally important that we entrust our past to His care.
After all, God has never changed and His love always remains the same.
What truths do you hold on to when you feel yourself slipping into regret?